Applejack's Diary
by Daniel Gallant
Summary: Applejack's diary of the events from the Memoirs Of A Reality Jumper.
1. Chapter 1 to 19

Dear Diary,

Today I meet a hyooman called Alex Roberts. Real polite, even apologized when I was the rude one. He was putting a stake together to start his life. I don't rightly know what he is, or why he was here. All I know is he needed help. It was the first time in my life I had to argue for less of a fee. He offered 20%, half for me, half for Rarity. Finally got him down to 10%. Still more than such an easy job is worth. He might give Rarity a run for her money for Element of Generosity.

He tried to explain where he was from, but to be honest, all I got was "far away".

Anyway, me and Rarity got working on it. With all that aluminium we both knew he was in for a whole heap of bits, so we pulled together some cash so he could get some place to stay and food to eat. We scraped together Ђ1,956 for him all together. That was fine, we knew our accounts were going to be flush soon enough.

Signed,

Loaded

* * *

><p>Dear Diary,<p>

Well, that Alex pony sure knows how to surprise. Rarity seems real impressed by what he done. Then again, that mare gets impresses if a stallion holds a door open for her. Anyway, he's uglier than sin. I think a shaved diamond dog would be cuter.

While Rarity and me were working, Applebloom came rushing in, talking a mile a minute. Once I calmed her down we got the story we knew Alex had told off Coins when he was bullying Scootaloo and sent him on his way. Then Dash pipes in and said his folks ain't as strong as pony folk. I have to admit, I thought that polite "nice pony" thing was just an act, but I might be wrong.

Once we told him his take, he did something I never expected, like he didn't want to disappoint me us. He promised not to sit on his flank, help others, and help the community. He may not be as ugly as all that.

Signed,

Impressed

* * *

><p>Dear Diary,<p>

OK, I usually don't say stuff like this, but Alex did something cute today. He came to visit me at the apple stand, I keep it because I love talking to folks in town, and bought apples. With all the bits he gave our family, he could have asked them for free. And there would have not been any argument on my part, but he argued to pay. He said I had worked my flank off and should be paid.

He's an odd one, so worried about being fair to others. Always seems to be afraid of taking advantage. He's a good person, darn shame he's not a pony.

I heard from Twilight he got a letter from Princess Celestia herself, proclaiming him a citizen. I think he'll make a fine addition to Ponyville.

Signed,

Glad

* * *

><p>Dear Diary,<p>

The stupid fool went and banged himself up real bad saving the Tree Trimmer kid. Dash stayed with him at the hospital the whole time he was out. I know she hates hospitals and boredom even more, but she stayed there like a mother with her foal. I wanted to stay too, my family owed him for the gift he gave us, but I had a farm that needed running. It's funny, when he called me Pony Ann, my heart skipped a beat. I knew he was out of his gourd, and I pretended to laugh it off, but it put a warm spot in my heart. I still feel it when I think about it. I can't rightly say why.

Signed,

Confused

* * *

><p>Dear Diary,<p>

Alex is coming out of the hospital today. When I said to Alex to not hurt himself again, Dash flashed me the hardest glare, like I was trying to cuddle up to her husband. I don't think Alex caught that. And when he said "Yeas, dear." that warmed up my cheeks. Applejack, what are you thinking?

I also found out the stallion has real sharp senses. Of course he made a joke, but I don't think he was kidding by much.

And what was the first thing he worried about when we go to his house? That we didn't have any out of pocket expenses. He's got a caring heart, would fit in to the Apple family just fine. Just fine.

Signed,

Admiring

* * *

><p>Dear Diary,<p>

We went to the meeting with Princess Celestia. Before the time, Dash and Alex went off. I never should have left them out of my sight. Crazy fools almost got into a bar brawl. Lucky for both of them, Alex is clever and talked, well, lied really, his way out of it.

I guess Alex didn't have much of a connection with the Princess because he had a real hard time keeping it together. He stumbled and fell the last little bit and kind of threw himself face down in front of Her, just bawling like a baby. She sent us away, and later we found him in the antechamber with a couple of guards taking care of him. He was real quiet the rest of the day.

Signed,

Concerned

* * *

><p>Dear Diary,<p>

Fun fact, humans (Twilight showed me how to spell it), don't get drink on salt, just alcohol. Alex wanted some applejack, and of course he wanted the best. Got him some hard cider too.

But selling him some cider wsn't that part that made me happy, I would have just given it to him if he let me. The part that made me really happy? He wants to build a life. I'm not sure why that made me so happy, but it did.

Signed,

Happy And I Don't Know Why

* * *

><p>Dear Diary,<p>

Tonight Alex invited me and all the girls to a dinner party. I was worried about the food, but Alex never stops surprising. His apple pie was Apple good. I swear, he's an Apple in the wrong body.

Signed,

Pleased

* * *

><p>Dear Diary,<p>

He stood under her house all night. All. Night. Calling up to her like a love lost colt. Does he have feelings for her? No, I think he's just a decent person. Wouldn't tell me anything and Dash isn't talking.

I told Rarity I cared for him, and you know how she is, she just gave me that knowing smile and promised to keep it to herself. Ah didn't realize how much it would bother me when Dash hugged him and he hugged her back.

Sighed,

Flustered

* * *

><p>Dear Diary,<p>

When I saw Alex come up to the stand in that funny little run of his, I did something stupid, I made fun of him. I don't know what possessed me to say it, it just came out. I'm finding when he's around I just get, I don't know, silly. When he's around, I feel like a silly filly with her first crush. He's such a kidder, he just joked right back, as if we had planned it.

Just when I think I have that man, that's what they call human stallions, figured out, he does something else to worm his way into my heart. As soon he saw the flyer for the Sisterhood Social he wanted to help. He practically begged me to help set up. I know he's not that strong, but his heart is always willing, and that means more to me than anything else.

As a final act to make my heart flutter, holds me in his arms and tells me I'm his inspiration. I'm starting to think he's got feelings for me. I don't mind saying I blushed all over.

Signed,

Smitten

* * *

><p>Dear Diary,<p>

That Mac, always worried about my virtue. Heck, I'm stronger than a lot of stallions. And it really got me steamed when he started in about Alex hugging me. Well, I wasn't going to tell him how it made me feel, that was none of his business.

I think I understand what they mean by an inner beauty now. He's always kind, always doing what he can, and I saw him work so hard he would put Mac to shame. When he helped with the setup, he never stopped, never complained, he even sang for while, until Mac stopped him. I didn't understand it, but it sounded happy.

Dash flew in and started distracting him, so I sent Mac to send her on her way. I was busy, but I could see Alex and Mac were talking. Mac sure looked mad for second, so I decided to trot on over. By the time I got there, they was shaken hooves. That Alex, always trying to get a laugh, he squawks like a chicken before heading off.

At the end of the day, he worked as hard as I did when I refused help that one apple bucking season. I've never said this about any pony but in some ways he's stronger than Mac.

I'm glad I had the chance to sneak over to his place and get him something to eat. A hard working stallion needs a little something at the end of the day. He's a smart one, he'll know who it was from.

Signed

Falling in Love

* * *

><p>Dear Diary,<p>

So, Alex announced his hair brained scheme to us. Dash was behind him 100%. I've never seen Dash so, submissive. She may as well have said, "Whatever you say dear."

When he was asking my permission and he put his hand on me, I had to fight not to blush from my nose to my tail. I hope it didn't look like I was scowling at him.

I'm sure Dash has feelings for him too and I ain't never backed down from a fight. Now I know he's the stallion for me, even with his crazy ideas.

The next day, when he brought us coffee (he always gets it fixed up just right), I caught him getting an eyeful of my cutie mark. If we had been somewhere more private, I would have let him touch it.

The next day he started looking at my cutie mark right there in the marketplace! If we had be an a more private spot, I think I would have invited him to touch it. I know I'm not that kind of mare, but I also know he wouldn't be doing it for a cheep thrill. Dash was playing some stupid trick on him. The way he acted when I explained what it meant, well I know he's not that kind of man. I had to wave him off before he caused a scene, and I felt my heart ache doing it. Darn it, why didn't he do that in private. I can imagine those hands just... [spilled ink]

Now, for the part that made my heart melt, after he finished apologizing for Dash's stunt (I never get tired of that, it's so cute) he said I was just like his Ann. He loves her something fierce and maybe he can love me just as fierce.

Still, he was mighty mad at Dash. I'm not proud to say, but that made me happy.

Signed

Determined

* * *

><p>Dear Diary,<p>

Alex Roberts is the biggest fool in Equestria! Rose came to me and told me he bought our mortgage from Coins, which we were going to pay off in a couple of weeks, for Ђ65,000,000! That stupid idiot! I don't know why I had any feelings for such a stupid stupid pony.

Signed,

Frustrated

* * *

><p>Dear Diary,<p>

Maybe Alex isn't as much of fool as all that. This morning I get the rest of the story. I found out Coins made some kind of threat and Alex paid without hesitating.

Well, his afternoon I saw Alex, I told him how I felt. I beat around the bush and he was still upset about Coins so he didn't get what I was saying. The thing was, he was more upset at himself for falling for the trick than at Coins for tricking him. In the end, he just shrugged, counted his blessings, and let it drop. If that's not Apple family material, I don't know what is.

He gave away most of his fortune without a second thought. Then, he was going to give it to me as a Hearths Warming gift. I knew I had to tell him in no uncertain terms. Not that I'm prideful but I know I'm a looker. I started to get my man, and then he dropped a sonic rainboom on me. He thought it was Dash!

Now to be fair, she didn't tell him, he just assumed after she went and declared herself! Well there was no way I was letting her take credit for that. And then he asks me for advice on how to woo her! I felt like he had applebucked my heart. Well, when he put his hand on my shoulder I just couldn't stand it and I admit that I cried. Anyway, I told him everything. And he basically said he loved me too. But he needed time to think.

I think that's why I like love him. His big worry was that he was being fair to me. He didn't want to hurt me. Me. It wasn't himself he was worried about. I think he would make a fine addition to the family.

Signed,

Hopeful


	2. between chapter 19 and 20

Dear Diary,

It's been three days since I declared myself and I haven't seen Alex. In almost as long as I've known him he's come every day to the market stand to see me. I see what they mean by absence makes the heart grow fonder. I feel I love him now more than ever.

On that subject, I've tried to buck some sense to Mac, and I think I've convinced him that he's not some monster come to take advantage of his little sister. I doubt he'll ever call him a friend, but I think he's tolerate him now.

Speaking on Mac, before I talked to him today, he sure seemed upset about something. He mentioned visiting with Dash. I guess he found out she was pinning for Alex too.

I'm kind of upset at myself for harbouring bad feelings toward Dash. She didn't do it to spite me, and I can see why she would love him. And, I'm not going to cheat by seducing him like Rarity would. Not my style. Come to think of it, not Dash's style either.

But, I know I have an edge, fair and square over Dash. I remind him of Ann, and that should be enough, right? That practically makes me part of his family, so I don't know why i'm worried. I just hope Dash can forgive me.

Signed  
>Confidently Waiting<p> 


	3. Chapter 20

Dear Diary,

Today I got my heart broken by Alex, but he redeemed himself by reminding me I had a new brother and we would always be reminded of those we lost. No one else can have the relationship we have and that's just fine by me.

I thank Celestia he was more honest with himself than I was with myself. I do love him, like I love Mac or Apple Bloom. It still hurts that he's not my special friend, but I guess it's for the best. If he had doubts about us, how long would it have taken for me to have those same doubts. That would have been a disaster.

I can't be mad at Dash. I never had a chance and I just didn't know it. I'll have a talk with her tomorrow. I want to keep our friendship in one piece.

Signed  
>At Peace<p> 


	4. chapter 21

Dear Diary,

Today was a hard day. Not only did I have to talk Dash about Alex, but Alex visited me at the stand and tried to act like nothing happened. When I found out he was going to Caremel's wedding, and how he got invited, it just tore me up inside. I wanted to be his special friend even more than before. Now Applejack, you know darn well why that's not going to happen. It can't happen. But part of me doesn't care and wishes he hadn't looked so deep into his own heart. And it hurts that much more because I know it's for the best. Maybe I can get just one dance at the wedding, just to pretend for a few minutes.

Signed

Stoic

Dear Diary,

I usually don't write this early in the morning, but I have to record the dream I had last night, well, the part I remember anyway. Me and Dash were facing off in an arena, circling each other like predators. Alex was sitting on a stool at the sidelines. Me and Dash started tussling, then Dash was on op of me, pinning me down, about to win, when Alex yelled out something like, "I was wrong! I should have picked you!". The next thing I know it's Alex pinning me down, and he's coming down, getting closer to plant a kiss on me. When I woke up I [scratched out word] I'm so ashamed for so many reasons.

Signed

Angry with myself


	5. Chapter 22

Dear Diary,

Rare dun ask me the strangest thing. It was about a gift Alex was giving cousin Caramel for his wedding. Some bread, salt and a candle in a box. Rare said it was some kind of human wedding magic. Well, I trust Alex to always be kind. Still, I didn't think he was such a romantic and I told Rare that.

While we was talking, I talked about my feelings and confusion. Rare said she knew all about a, what she call it, unrequited love. I knew she liked Spike, but I didn't realize it ran that deep. It's good to know I have friend I can share that secret with.

Signed Resigned 


	6. Chapter 23

Dear Diary,

I made a fool of myself last night. Too much salt and thinking with my loins. Why in Celestia's name did I think kissing Alex in front of RD would be a good idea? Alex is not the kind of man to drop his marefriend for a pretty face, I darn well know that. Why did I try that? The truth is, I wanted him to know if he had any doubts about RD, that he could come to me. I think that'll be very clear.

But, I don't think it will ever happen. I saw the way they danced, the way they talked afterwards, and the way Alex ran out to stop us.

So, now I have a choice to make, pine away for a man I can never have, or try to find the stallion for me. If nothing else this whole situation made me realize how lonely I am.

Signed

Pensive


	7. Chapter 25

Dear Diary,

Well, today I learned a hard lesson about love and friendship. We used to send a letter o Princess Celestia when we learned a lesson, but this time, I think I'll be sending one to Princess Luna, see'n as she controls romantic love. Here is what I wrote:

* * *

><p><em>Dear Princess Luna,<em>

_My name is Applejack and while I usually send letters to your sister, I felt you were the one to get ths letter. As you know, I thought I was in romantic love with your Paladin, Alex. I even made a fool of myself trying to take him away from Rainbow Dash. _

_I learned there are many different kinds of love, like the one I share with Alex. A full heart aching love, like the kind I have for Mac or Apple Bloom. I now know it was never meant to be, and if it is, both of us must feel the same way. Romantic love has to be both ways._

_I thank you for your guidance, your loyal subject,_  
><em>Applejack.<em>

* * *

><p>Of course, now Alex wants to set me up with one of his friends. I figure any pony good enough to be called a friend is good enough for me to try on a date. Wish me luck.<p>

Signed,  
>Content<p> 


	8. Chapter 27

Dear Diary,

Alex and Twilight have gone to canterlot. Rainbow Dash is with them. I was busy, so I didn't have the time to see them all off. Why do I do that to myself? I made up with RD, Alex don't hold no grudge, and me? I hold on. I know. Maybe I need a distraction.

I made a date with Alex's friend, Elusive, this afternoon. When I walked in his store he was talking all queer, but as soon as he done realize who I was, he started talking normal. He said Alex told him all about me. Knowing Alex, he skipped over the part where I was a crazy nag that tried to steal him away from Rainbow Dash.

That Elusive wasn't anything like I expected. First off, I was expecting Rarity turned into a colt. He may be a tailor, and he may have what Rarity says is taste, but he's a regular stallion. He was awful nice, and I don't think I intimidated him one bit. It's like he knew exactly what to say. I'm guessing Alex had a little something to do with that, but I'm willing to give him a fair shake.

Signed,  
>Moving Forward <p>


	9. Chapter 28

Dear Diary,

I went on my first date last night. I call it my first date because both of us wanted to be there and we both knew it was a date. He took me to the BBQ Pit, just outside of Ponyville. They've got the best roasted carrots in town and I knows they use Sweet Apple Acres apples in their apple pie. I was a little surprised he took me there. I figured it was just more advice from Alex, but he told me that was him. He said in his queer voice, "I know you are more than capable of doing fancy and elegant," and I gotta tell ya, that voice makes me laugh, but then he switched to his normal voice, "but I think you like honest food better."

Then, he went and said something that really got my heart to flutter. "Applejack, you're real pretty, but I want to get to know the pony behind that face. I want to know that, if this gets serious, it's you I like, not just your pretty face. I know what it's like to be judged by your outside, and I don't want to be unfair to you." When I think on it, I'm sure it's something Alex would have coached him to say. He may not have come up with it, but I think he really honestly means it.

We talked all night. We talked a little about ourselves, our family businesses, our friends. But, we mostly talked about ourselves and our family. I wanted to give him a fair shake at getting to know me, the real me, and it looks like he was doing the same thing. I felt so darn comfortable around him I even told him about Ma and Pa. Silly thing to do on a first date, but if he likes me, for me, it won't make no difference to him.

Anyway, it went real good. By the end of the night it was like we had been friends for years. And, while I pride myself in not judging others by their looks, he's not hard on the eyes. At the end of the evening he walked me home to the front gate, and I took a, what did Rarity call them, a romantic opportunity. Yes, I kissed a colt on the first date. Just on the cheek. But, it felt good, knowing he looked at me as something beyond my looks.

I think he's a keeper and I'm looking forward to what the future brings with us.

Signed,  
>Full of Hope <p>


	10. Chapter 31

Dear Diary,

Well that didn't last long. I was on my second date with Elusive and he took me to that fancy frufru restaurant in town. We started making small talk and such, but we soon got quiet. We kept talking about the same stuff as on our first date, rehashing our last conversations, until there was nothing left to say. I tried talking about farming and he tried talking about sewing and such but there just wasn't anything left to talk about. For a little while, he relaxed and made some jokes in that funny voice of his, so the evening wasn't a total loss.

I'm wondering if Alex coached him on what to say and do on our first date. It sounds like the kind of thing Alex would do. Shame he used all his material on the first date. To add insult to injury, he wouldn't let me pay my half of the meal. Still, I can't be too mad, he was just trying to be a gentle colt. Dang fool even asked me out again. And being a dang fool myself, I said yes. I hope it wasn't a mistake.

Signed,  
>Cautious<p>

P.S. I have to admit, he's still a mighty fine looken' stallion, not hard on the eyes at all. Not one bit. Maybe his innards will grow on me. 


	11. Chapter 31,5

/-  
> Story: Applejack's Diary / Chapter: Chapter 31.5 / Author: Techogre /-

Dear Diary,

Tonight was magical. I know that's not how I usually talk, but it fit perfectly this time.

It started out so wonderful, with Elusive taking me to Stargazer Hill for an evening picknick. The stars were so bright and happy, and he made an apple pie that was not too bad. Of course, my standard for pie is likely higher than most folks, and his was not bacd. We laughed and talked about our families. And we both stopped talking at about the same time.

That's when it happened. He leaned in for a kiss, but stopped, then kind of looked sad. He told me that Alex had given him a lot of help to impress me. He also made a confession. He said, "I want to tell you the truth, and I hope you won't hate me. At first I just liked what I saw, just your looks, but the more I've gotten to know you, the more I've learned what a wonderful person you are. I know you always worry about the stallions in your life, just wanting to be with a pretty lady. That was me, before. Now? Well, that's just a nice bonus. I've fallen in love with you. The real you. So now that you know, I hope you will consider being my special friend, Applejack."

All I could do was kiss that fool.

Signed,  
>Oh so happy. <p>


	12. Chapter 31,75

Dear Diary,

Alex is coming home from Canterlot tomorrow, with Twilight. And Dash, I suppose. I hope he got all his business done, I know I hate that big city, and I think he does too. Anyway, I'll remind those two about the Running of the Leaves race this weekend. I think Alex will have fun running it, and a rematch with Dash would be good too.

I had another wonderful date with Elusive tonight. We went star gazing again, and we got real close. In fact, I let him touch my cutie mark. He's the first one I actually let touch. He was real gentle. Make me feel respected and loved, not like some cheep floozy. He makes me feel happy. When he escorted me home, we stopped a little ways from the house, and I showed him how special he makes me feel. I've never kissed any stallion like that before. Never.

Tomorrow, when we're meeting them at the train station, I'll ask Elusive if he wants to run the race too, just to make sure Alex doesn't keel over or something. I'm always so worried about him.

Signed,  
>Happy to have a life <p>


	13. Chapter 32

Dear Diary,

I was in the south orchards today, with Big Mac, when Elusive came running in from Ponyville. At first we thought there was something wrong and charged toward him, but as I got closer, I saw he had this goofy grin on his face and a little box hovering in his magic. Why, I didn't know what was going on, but I was powerful happy to see him.

He said, "Applejack, I couldn't sleep, and I could only think of you, and, this was my mother's, and, well, will you be my special friend?" He opened the box and there was a unicorn ring on a knot tied necklace. "The ring was mom's, but I made the necklace to hold it. It's not much, but, will you accept it? Will you be my special somepony?"

All I could do was look at him, and his wonderful gift, with a slack jawed goofy grin. Oh my. My heart was all a flutter, I had tears in my eyes, and I was dumbstruck.

Big Mac can get over protective sometimes, and he's much bigger than Elusive, heck even I'm a little bigger than him. But I wished he hadn't picked such a time to be so, so, pig headed. He started yelling at Elusive, "What do you think you're playing at colt. How dare you bother her in the middle of the work day. You're lucky you're Alex's friend, or I'd thump some sense into you!"

That Alex, always protecting his friends and family. Even when he's all the way in Canterlot.

I've got to say, I was impressed by Elusive. I could tell he was scared, but he stood his ground. "Big Mac, I know you can beat me up. Being a tailor I don't have your muscles, but if you think I'll walk away because you're bigger and stronger than me, you've got another thing coming." He turned back to me and said, "Applejack, will you be my special somepony?"

I did the only thing I could. I stood between the two before Mac could start up again and said the one thing that would stop this ruckus, I said, "Yes. I'll be your special somepony."

I can't wait to tell RD and Alex. I know they'll be real happy for me.

Signed,  
>A Special Somepony <p>


	14. Chapter 33

Applejack's Diary by Techogre

Dear Diary,

It was not the night I had imagined. At all.

It all started off great with everyone at the platform, hugs and welcome backs all around. The first surprise was Alex and R.D. gettin hitched. I was a little confused as to how I felt, at least until I caught Elusive grinning at me. I knew right then and there where my heart was. I was even a naughty filly and snuck him a kiss, right in the middle of that crowd. I think Mac saw us and wasn't too happy, but that's just too bad for him.

Pinkie led us all to Alex's house for one of her great parties. I don't know how she does it, but everyone always has a great time.

A couple of hours into that shing-ding I could tell R.D. was getting tired of it. I saw her whisper something to Alex and saw him whisper something to Trixie Beatrix. Next thing I know she's putting on a quick show to distract us while they slipped out. I'm no Twilight Sparkle, but even I know when I'm being distracted. Anyway about three quarters of an hour later R.D. comes crashing in through the door, almost ripping it out of its hinges. She starts going on about Alex holding off a popping cat, alone, by the old far north field we left fallow, and how Twilight and Fluttershy need to get there to save Alex. Well you didn't need to tell us twice, most of the adults charged out the door with Elusive leading the way. That stallion sure knows how to impress a mare.

R.D. and Fluttershy were ahead of us, Twilight not far behind them, and the rest of us following as fast as we could. Just before the rest of us got there there Flutters came tearing past us, toward her cottage. She was bawling like a foal and we expected the worse. By the time we all got there it was all over, and it was a grisly mess.

I can't go on. I'll write more tomorrow.

Signed,

Shook up but proud


	15. Chapter 34

In some ways, it was worse than we imagined. Alex was sitting on an old stump, covered in blood, crying. Dash wasn't holding him, or comforting him at all. She was just sitting close by, her back to him.

I was so mad at the so called Element of Loyalty for abandoning her stallion that I walked right up to him and held him. Elusive followed suit, then that hussy Beatrix, even Big Mac put a hoof on his shoulder. We didn't hold on to him too tight, seeing as he had a hurt arm and all, but we did help him up and get him to the hospital.

Everyone except me, Elusive, Big Mac, and Beatrix left. While we was waiting, Dash came out and gave me a sign that she wanted to talk in private. Bea and Mac was talking in the corner, so I sent my Elusive to get some coffee. He's real sweet and I think he knew we needed some private time, because he said it may take a while, maybe half an hour. Then he quickly added, "Or, it can be faster if you want it to be." He made me chuckle at his consideration and I said a half hour would be fine.

Me and Dash found a quiet spot and as soon as the door was closed; before it had even stopped swinging, Dash started to cry.

"It was terrible, he killed it without a second thought. I told him, right there, AJ. I told him I didn't want to stay with him. I couldn't even make myself hold him and comfort him, AJ. I told him I didn't want to be with him tonight, and I didn't know when I would be ready."

Then, R.D. did something I have never seen her do, she cried and sobbed like a foal. "I don't want it to be Gilda all over again. He's not like her, AJ. He's warm and kind, and... and good, but he's got that same wild, dangerous animal inside of him. He can be so cold blooded, just like when he cut the cat's throat, then yelled at Flutters for being upset with him. I just don't want to deal with that kind of stuff again. Not again."

R.D. carried on a while more, but all I could think about was that she may not love him anymore. In fact, I couldn't even bring myself say anything in his defence, like... like I wanted their relationship to fail.

The only thing I could say was that she should follow her heart. She took off, right then and there.

After we got word from the doc that he was patched up and could leave any time, he didn't come out of the treatment room. Beatrix had said Princess Luna told her to keep an eye on him, so after about half an hour, she went in to check on him.

She didn't come out for a few minutes, so I went to see what in tarnation was going on. I got in there and for a split second I thought I was in the wrong room and had walked into a couple make'n hay. The Beatrix hussy was holding her tail high enough that I got an eyeful of her privates.

Well, Alex being Alex, he smoothed everything over, and we both held him for a few minutes. The Beatrix isn't all that bad.

I'll finish this up tomorrow.

Signed,  
>Tired from a long night.<p>

P.S.

On the way home, after Alex did what he wanted to do, I had a thought catch me completely by surprise. _'If Dash don't want him, I'll take him.'_ I wanted to track her down and tell her to forget about him and find somepony else, anypony else, go back to Gilda, anything for me to try him again. I shouldn't be thinking this, I have a wonderful special friend, Elusive. I love him, don't I? Alex is just a brother, nothing more, right? Am I lying to myself about one or the other? I'm not, am I? I'm the Element of Honesty, I should know when I'm lying. I am truly ashamed and hating myself for thinking such thoughts.


	16. Chapter 35

Dear Diary,

I sure had judged that Beatrix wrong.

Alex was saying the kind of stuff he usually does, blaming himself for everything under Celestia's sun. While we all stood back and gave him his space she said a few words that seemed to calm him right down. Landsakes, I never saw Alex calm down like that before. After he seemed a a little out of it, half asleep on Mac's back with Twilight holding him up, so we let him rest. Well, afterwards she hung by me, talking low.

I told her that was a mighty fine bit of head work she did on Alex. I swear that colt just gets so wrapped up in himself he needs that once in awhile. I was surprised when she scolded me. Kindly, but it was still a scolding.

"Sometimes, Applejack, a pony can only take so much danger, so much stress, so much fear, before they break down. It used to be called Battle Shock, from when soldiers experienced a very serious fight. Bucking and hoofing others, hoping their buddies didn't get hurt; not even a highly trained guard-stallion can take that for a long time. In the end some soldiers had mental breakdowns. Those experiences hurt them deep in their souls."

"Therapists now call it ITS, Induced Trauma Syndrome, because other ponies can experience it too. It can happen after losing a loved one in a monster attack, or witnessing the death of a loved one in an accident. And it can even happen without any fatalities, just something terrifying."

"Princess Luna gave me his background, and you have to understand that it's amazing that he's as sane as he is. Do you know how long he's been on the run? Sixty years. Sixty years of terror, and now he's here. This is the safest place he's been in a lifetime. I can only imagine what kept his mind in one piece for so long."

"With that said, I think Alex is suffering from this, based on how he behaves. Ever notice he gets that thousand meter stare from time to time? How he blames himself for everything? How he throws himself into dangerous situations? Classic symptoms. He may never fully recover from it, but he's strong, and has a lot of support from friends and adopted family."

I asked her how she knew all this. She told me, "I had a gig to entertain at the training field outside of Canterlot and there was always a few colts on the edge of the crowd that looked... blank. I asked about them after the show and the doctor was kind enough to explain it to me. I made sure to treat them with extra attention and made sure to get the most cheers for them."

I told her, in no uncertain terms, that after what she did to my brother (the monkey one, hehe) that she was as much a part of our family as anyone. She looked away, kind of sad, and said that meant the world to her.

When I first met her, I thought she was all hat and not cattle. Turns out, she's got some cattle to go with that hat.

Signed,  
>Happy to have a new friend, maybe a sister<p>

P.S. - When I saw Alex come back down, all clean and proper, with his clothes all fixed up and Elusive fussing over him like a mother hen, well, my heart did flutter. When me and Elusive was alone in Alex's house, I gave that handsome unicorn the biggest, deepest kiss I could offer. When we stopped to catch our breath, he said he loved me. Dear Celestia those words were so sweet to me, especially from this wonderful, kind stallion. I just hope Mac warms up to him soon. I'd hate to be a bride without a best stallion.


	17. Chapter 35,33

Dear Diary

When Elusive and me were done tucking Alex in, Bea joined us walking back to the farm. She went and insulted me as surely as slapping my face. She had the gall to ask where there was a hotel or inn in town. I asked that silly filly why she needed that. Didn't she have a place to stay the night? Well, she said that in the excitement, she forgot to ask Alex about that place he had arranged for her. No address, no key, no roof over her head for the night. Why, I told her, again, anypony who takes care of Apple family the way she had is part of the family.

Mac spoke up, saying it was also the neighborly thing to do. I suspect my dear big brother, the pony one, has his eye on a certain show pony. After it was settled I could see Mac had a mighty big smile. Is he sweet on her? I always thought it would be him and Fluttershy in the end. I'll have to make sure Bea'll treat my brother right. The pony one. Heh, that never gets old.

So, while we were sitting at the kitchen table, winding down from a crazy night with some hot apple cider, Bea said she reckons we need to tell Dash about Alex. In fact, we should probably tell all the ponies who are near him so we can all help him out. But she also warned us that he can't know that we know. Not yet anyhow.

Signed  
>Happy I have more family to love<p> 


	18. Chapter 35,66

Dear Diary

When I woke up this morning, my mouth was watering. I was sure Granny had made one of her usual breakfasts, with all the fixings. But, on the way, I noticed the guest room door was open, and the bed was made. I had to wonder if Bea had even stayed here after all.

I came down the stairs and saw Granny sitting in her rocking chair, looking pleased as punch. Who do you think I saw in the kitchen looking happy as a filly with a candy apple? None other than Bea. She was using her magic to set the table, cook the breakfast, all the while having a chat with Granny.

I usually don't eavesdrop, but I felt such a warm feeling in my heart, I just had to know what the cause was. Well, Bea was talking about her Granny and how she use to help her feed the other performers in the circus. I never realized circus work was so much like farm work. I tell ya, I've got some new respect for that girl.

I decided that I had heard enough and went into to the kitchen. Bea greeted me with friendly, "Morning Sweety," and a plate of hotcakes landed at my place at the table with a steaming mug of coffee, "eat up, we're soon heading out to help Alex clean up the mess that thing made."

I thanked her kindly and ate up. I hate to say it, but them pancakes was even better than Granny's. Granny said they was different, but just as good. That's high praise from her.

Bea got a mischievous grin and said in that show pony voice of hers, "Of course. Trixie is a world class chef. Anything anyone can do, I can do better." She then laughed at her silliness and started apologizing.

I told her, "Don't you dare be apologizing for that. Showing off is part of who you are, sugar cube. And we like who you are." Bea, got really quiet and thanked me. She got real introspective like. I know she's not the same pony that first visited Ponyville. I don't know what changed exactly, but I'm happy for her that it did.

Anyway, she had made more than enough for everyone, and even some without hay for Alex. We brought the ones for Alex and the rest of the leftovers in a basket. He might as well enjoy this great food. Bea even used her magic to keep it warm for him.

While Mac was getting the picks and shovels packed away, Apple Bloom went to get Scootaloo. They'll be meeting us at Alex's cottage. May as well get her to help out her dad, even if her mom won't be there.

Signed,  
>More love and respect for a new friend<p> 


	19. Chapter 36

Dear Diary,

When I found Rainbow and Alex together in bed this morning, I just about bucked her out of the balcony door. What stopped me was Alex. He explained what was going on. I knew it was the truth. The real truth. That Rainbow is good enough for him. Well, I left them two lovebirds alone, just in case Alex was feeling like a love bird. He was banged up pretty bad, but a good night sleep with someone you love, I can't see that stopping a frisky stallion man.

I've got to say, it made me think of Elusive when I was going back down. Truth be known, I walked a little slower than I could have, just so I could have a little more time with my thoughts of him. I even stopped at the base of the stairs, lost in thought for a moment. I can't wait to see him later today.

When I got back to the kitchen Mac was still outside. Bea looked at me and asked me point blank who I was pining for. "I've seen that look, Applejack." Then she got kind of sad and said, "Sweetie, I've had that look. Just, be careful. Don't forget that a stallion always has his pick."

I was a little sore at what she said, but with that look on her face, I knows she must have been a powerful hurt by some stallion. And my Elusive is as loyal as Rainbow. But she's been unloyal too. And the truth is, she's right, the stallion has all the choices. But, why am I think this. Elusive is different, isn't he?

Signed,  
>Still happy but with some doubts<p> 


	20. Chapter 38

Dear Diary,

I know it wasn't fair, all three of us ganging up on him, but that stubborn fool needs all three of us to set him straight. Anyway, he'll be busy with the adoption proceedings this afternoon. we'll have to have a party for the new Apples as soon as we can.

Elusive walked me to the apple stand again. I swear, if he heaps anymore attention on me, I'll burst. Still, it absolutely makes a girl feel special. Rarity said she was jealous of me, the other day. How I could snag an honest to goodness gentlecolt, while she seems to attract only children and brutes.

Now I usually don't put any kin into any gossip I hear, but I couldn't help it this time. There was the usual gossip around him of course, like that he hunts ponies at night, and he acts as Luna's iron hoof of justice. I suppose if a pony was a threat to themselves or others he would do it in a heartbeat, but since that wasn't the case, right now, I made sure to correct them. They always ask why I stand up for him like I do. The looks I get when I tell them he's my adopted brother. I think they see him in a different light.

While I've never bothered to record any of that gossip here, this one is kind of funny. This time, there was some crazy rumours that he got Rainbow in the family way, but had to cover it up with a fake adoption. I made sure Carrot Top got a basic education in biology and repeatin' nasty things about an Apple, my best friend, and a soon to be Apple filly.

Now, the last rumor I heard really made me surprised, and if I can talk to Alex or Rainbow, I sure would like to know if it was true. There was some excitement at the Coins place, apparently Alex scared the dickens out of Silver Spoon. I doubt he was trying to eat her, and I told them so. I knows Butterscotch wouldn't say a nice thing to save her life, so I don't trust her. But, what in the hay would Alex be doing there anyway. He's not due to see him until later this week.

Signed,  
>Amused and Confused<p> 


	21. Chapter 41

Dear Diary,

I could just stomp, I was so mad. Alex came by the stand, bold as brass with his foreleg out of a sling. Doc Pulse told him he needed to keep it up. I know he's not a pony and knows himself best, but gosh darn it he should still listen to the healer.

Not that I had any doubts about him being a pa, but when he was worried about Scootaloo getting to school on time, well that just warmed my heart. I have to admit, a tiny part of my wondered what it would have been like.

Well, he did put in a solid half day of work in, so I can't be too upset. He even helped out one of my best customers when she dropped her bag of apples. That Bonbon sure can be a shy one.

Well he went off to visit Bea, just to make sure she was settling in just fine in my her place. I thought that was mighty neighbourly. That Bea, once I got to know the real her, is almost like family. Big Macintosh sure thinks so.

Speakin' of which, when Dash came looking for Alex, she looked as happy as any mare could be. Stated telling me how Derpy was with foal, and how she felt a little jealous. She made me promise not to tell Alex, cause she didn't want to make him feel bad. "Besides," she said, "I've got Scootaloo. I skipped right over the diapers and went straight to cool filly. I should be satisfied, right?" Well, I'm not sure how much she was fooling herself, but I do know there was more to it than that.

After our little heart to heart, she went of to find Alex at Bea's. The rest of the afternoon went quietly, except for the big event.

Anywho, I'm tired for now. I'll tell you all about the big fracas next time.

Signed,

Happy, a little unsure, and worried about her friend.


	22. Chapter 46

Dear Diary,

What a fracas. The whole town was attacked by diamond dogs! Of course I didn't know that at first, so I'll start from the beginning.

I was at the apple stand when I heard panicking ponies headed to the town hall for shelter. Most ponies would have followed their lead and panicked too. Before Twilight came along I would have too, truth be known. Now, I charged into whatever they were running from.

Strange days. Ponies jumping into the jaws of danger. Humans, predators worse than griffins, owl-bears, and wargs put together, steal pony hearts and become family. They make families of their own.

So, I took a moment to figure out what was going on and it looked like ponies were streaming into the town hall from every direction. I was able to stop Silver Thought, she owns the old book store in town, and ask her what was going on.

She said, "I always wanted to be an adventurer, but not like this." I tried my best to calm her down, but I'm just not good at that. I wish Alex had been down there, he would have calmed her lickety split.

Once I did have her able to talk properly, I was able to find out there were dogs attacking. It was almost funny, once I got her calm, she got mad. Real mean. Fluttershy mad. She said something about getting her frying pan to protect her shop, then took off with this grim look of determination. I feel real sorry for the dogs that cross her path.

I made my way toward the library. Twilight would know what to do. On the way, I worried about Big Mac and Alex. More so about Alex.

I knew Alex could take care of himself and any ponies around him. I was still worried. Not worried worried, but still worried.

I ran into a couple of diamond dogs on the way and showed them not every pony is afraid of them. Don't get me wrong, I was scared , but at that time I just didn't have time.

I finally got to the library and got the news. I know the DD were no good varmints, but I figured they had some kind of decency. I was wrong. I never figured they would attack a school full of foals. Not only that, but they sent ransom demands. Four tons of dried pork, a ton of dried cheese, half a ton of hard tack, a ton of dried apple, a ton of dried vegetables, and half a ton of salt. Maybe there was more, but that's all I remember.

What struck me as strange was no demands for slaves or bits, just food and salt. I heard some non-pony folk use salt to preserve food so it fits in with the rest of the demands.

Anyway, that's when I found out about the foalnapping. Me and Twi didn't even have to say nothing. She put Spike in the basement safe room (for when her experiments go a little off) and we charged off.

Along the way we saved some more folks from dogs. I was burning mad because they was stopping me from saving Apple Bloom and her friends. About the time we get to Town Hall, there was a long sad howl. Every dog in sight just stopped and looked around like they couldn't believe their ears. Even the ones in a brawl just backed away and stopped.

We still couldn't get to the school with all the ponies, dogs, and other folk blocking up the roads around the town hall. I was so frustrated I must have shouted something. Twilight was shocked at what I said because she said, "Applejack! There are foals around."

I told her what I honestly felt, "Maybe so, but not the right ones."

I regretted saying it as soon as the words left my mouth. It might have been the truth, but sometimes a little white lie is better than the truth. This here was one of them times. I told her I was powerful sorry for what I said. That was the first white lie. The second was, "We need to help out whatever folks we can on the way to the school."

With this in mind and with what looked like the raid being over, we made our way to the school.

On the way we saw a frightening sight. Being lead away, back to where we came from, was the biggest Diamond Dog I've ever seen. Not that I've seen very many, but it was huge. Anyway, it must have been a dangerous customer 'cuz it had three guard ponies around it and its front paws were in heavy shackles.

One thing I can tell you is it didn't walk like a defeated creature. It walked with all the pride of a king or princess.

As I watched it go by there was a group of angry looking ponies just glaring hate at it. All of a sudden somepony in that mob shouted, "Take this, you worthless mutt." A big rock or cobblestone arced out of crowd and hit the diamond dog square in the eye.

That was something I never thought I would see in Ponyville. Giving the stink-eye would be the worst I would have expected to see a pony do. Them dogs must have been mean as sin for a pony to throw something. Still, I wondered if that would have been enough for a pony to change so much.

I jumped back when that dog turned back toward the mob, easily dragging the pony holding the shackles. This critter was strong, maybe stronger than Big Macintosh.

I'm pretty sure it was a she from the sound of her voice. She said, "Me finding better way. Pink monkey promised my daughter not go hungry. On day you find me, apologize, and me accept."

Pink monkey? Oh Alex, always fixing things.

Signed,

Happy this night is over.

P.S. By the time I got to the school, Alex had already gone home. The doctor that took care of him said he was banged up but he would be fine in a few days, all he needed was rest. I'll go see him in the morning.


	23. Chapter 48

Dear Diary,

I was so scared for Apple Bloom, I don't know what I would do if something had happened to her. When I finally made my way to the school I saw the smashed window and the blood stains on the gravel path. I'm not ashamed to say my heart jumped straight into my throat. When I saw Cheerilee leading her foals out and I saw Applebloom with them, it was a mighty powerful weight pulled off my chest. I'd been told that none of the foals got seriously hurt, but a sister's gonna worry. Not seriously hurt could still mean hurt.

Now it ain't the pony way to resort to violence, and definitely not to that level, but I can't lie to my heart. It was sure satisfying knowing it was Alex who put that blood there keeping Apple Bloom safe. Family takes care of family and my brother is no exception. He sure didn't go by half measures.

Yet when I saw him later, it tore my heart. Both of his forelimbs must've been broken, seeing they were covered in some weird green casts. Even then, he still was smiling. I don't think he spotted me and it weren't the fake smile of somepony who didn't want to worry you.

Rainbow was with me when we fought off the Diamond Dogs and I never saw her fight so fiercely to get to her kin. It made me proud to know she was my family. I'm sure she was hurting about Alex, I could tell. It ain't right for your stallion to get hurt. I love Alex, but he is as stubborn as any Apple. It's about time to tell him he needs to slow down. He's got a family to worry about now.

Mighty hypocritical of me I know, but family has to look out for family after all.

Well, anyhow, I decided to leave him in Rainbow's hooves and went off to check on Apple Bloom. When she saw me, she bolted towards me, much to Cheerilee's concern, and gave me the longest hardest hug. She must have held on for a full minute without a word, then she told me all about what happened.

According to her, three huge diamond dogs crashed into their classroom and the janitor, Dusty, tried to kick them out. They knocked him out of their way like a rag doll. Even that little colt Steelskin got between them and the rest of the class. Of course, being so small, he got smacked down too. That was a brave and foolhardy thing to do. I'll have to give him an apple pie. After that, Alex comes in all slick as you like, big 'ol smile, asking them to give up.

When they attacked him, he showed 'em what for, but then the big one hit Scoots. I could tell little Bloom was real scared. That done pushed his buttons right awful. He got real scary, not that she was afraid he would do something to her, but what he would do to the dog. He snarled like some furious mother bear and he tackled it through the window. Cheerilee kept all the kids away from the window and from seeing what was happening, but they could all hear the horrible yelps from the dog get weaker and weaker. Scoots pushed past Cheerilee and ran outside. Apple Bloom didn't see much after that, but could hear Scootaloo shouting, then things got real quiet.

In all this confusion with all the young 'uns, I didn't notice a pony slide up beside me and with a deep voice he whispered in my ear, "Hi, apple dumpling,". I smiled and kissed that stallion as fierce as I could. My Elusive was safe and sound. I didn't realize how much I was worried about that darn foolish unicorn until that moment.

I held him until I heard Trixie talking in that over the top way she does when entertaining folks. "Well, well, well. The Great and Powerful Trixie is pleased to see her friend Applejack has found her special somepony. Tell your stallion to move so I may allow you to hug me." Elusive backed away and that crazy mare hugged me tight. That Trixie, she always knows how to make a body laugh. She talked normally after that, telling us about the ponies she kept safe. She also let me know she checked on Pinkie, Rarity, and Fluttershy and they was all fine.

Before she left, she said something odd, but sweet. She said, "It is my belief that we Paladins need to help keep you Element Bearers safe, so that you can save us all."

Don't quite know what to make of that.

Signed,

Just happy everypony is okay


End file.
